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joachim_s
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Posts: 262
Joined: Sat May 09, 2015 11:27 pm

Thoughts on this 80s kind of song?

Sat Feb 15, 2020 3:01 pm

Hi!

Would love some constructive thoughts on this piece that I wrote. I'm mostly concerned with how it's built up, part by part, layer by layer. Need some other people's ears, and people on here seem friendly so... :)

Hope Dropbox is ok.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/qrihwtwi2zcqcr6/Prometheus%20%28demo%29.mp3?dl=0
Logic versions: Logic Pro X 10.5.1 (MBP and iMac)
Mainstage versions: MainStage 3 3.4.3 (MBP and iMac)
OS: MacBook Pro – Catalina 10.15.6 (MBP and iMac)
Computer: MacBook Pro (15", mid 2015) / iMac (27", late 2012)
Processor: MBP – 2,8 GHz Intel Core i7 / iMac – 3,4 GHz Intel Core i7
Memory: MBP – 16 GB / iMac – 24 GB
Audio interface manufacturer and model: Apogee Duet the iOS+OS X version and Focusrite 18:8
 
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fuzzfilth
Posts: 4074
Joined: Mon Aug 03, 2009 2:31 am
Location: Germany

Re: Thoughts on this 80s kind of song?

Sat Feb 15, 2020 3:33 pm

Gary Numan would have been proud of you. Back in the 80s. Then, you spend 30 seconds before any kind of melody comes in. In that timespan, modern kids have checked out 29 more songs.
Christian Obermaier
Contact me for private Logic Consulting, Training, Troubleshooting via Skype, Zoom or Teamviewer

1 x MacPro 6core 2010 24Gb RAM
2 x MacBookPro i7 2012 16Gb RAM
OSX.14.6. Mojave, Logic X.4.4 & 5.1
 
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joachim_s
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Posts: 262
Joined: Sat May 09, 2015 11:27 pm

Re: Thoughts on this 80s kind of song?

Sat Feb 15, 2020 11:24 pm

fuzzfilth wrote:
Gary Numan would have been proud of you. Back in the 80s. Then, you spend 30 seconds before any kind of melody comes in. In that timespan, modern kids have checked out 29 more songs.


Yes. Numan IS a big inspiration for me! Didn’t think that would be obvious in this track though :) For this song I believe Cocteau Twins is even more important.

Yeah. I like that kind of build up in songs. I feel that if this track would’ve been too head on to the main theme and/or stronger parts, then that would be turning an alternative 80s sounding indie song into a contribution for the Eurovision Song Contest. However, I think maybe I need to make it a bit shorter and a bit more head on. Is it interesting enough I mean?
Logic versions: Logic Pro X 10.5.1 (MBP and iMac)
Mainstage versions: MainStage 3 3.4.3 (MBP and iMac)
OS: MacBook Pro – Catalina 10.15.6 (MBP and iMac)
Computer: MacBook Pro (15", mid 2015) / iMac (27", late 2012)
Processor: MBP – 2,8 GHz Intel Core i7 / iMac – 3,4 GHz Intel Core i7
Memory: MBP – 16 GB / iMac – 24 GB
Audio interface manufacturer and model: Apogee Duet the iOS+OS X version and Focusrite 18:8
 
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fuzzfilth
Posts: 4074
Joined: Mon Aug 03, 2009 2:31 am
Location: Germany

Re: Thoughts on this 80s kind of song?

Sun Feb 16, 2020 10:13 am

joachim_s wrote:
Is it interesting enough ?

That's a weird question. Interesting enough for what ? And asking if its good enough implies you might as well go on improving it, so why stop here ?
Christian Obermaier
Contact me for private Logic Consulting, Training, Troubleshooting via Skype, Zoom or Teamviewer

1 x MacPro 6core 2010 24Gb RAM
2 x MacBookPro i7 2012 16Gb RAM
OSX.14.6. Mojave, Logic X.4.4 & 5.1
 
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joachim_s
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Posts: 262
Joined: Sat May 09, 2015 11:27 pm

Re: Thoughts on this 80s kind of song?

Sun Feb 16, 2020 11:56 am

fuzzfilth wrote:
joachim_s wrote:
Is it interesting enough ?

That's a weird question. Interesting enough for what ? And asking if its good enough implies you might as well go on improving it, so why stop here ?


Well, you pointed out that the song took some time to build up, from a modern perspective. So that’s what I mean by if it’s interesting enough: it’s a hard balance sometime between sparse and overfull I think and I need other people’s ears since I’ve heard the song one too many times :D
Logic versions: Logic Pro X 10.5.1 (MBP and iMac)
Mainstage versions: MainStage 3 3.4.3 (MBP and iMac)
OS: MacBook Pro – Catalina 10.15.6 (MBP and iMac)
Computer: MacBook Pro (15", mid 2015) / iMac (27", late 2012)
Processor: MBP – 2,8 GHz Intel Core i7 / iMac – 3,4 GHz Intel Core i7
Memory: MBP – 16 GB / iMac – 24 GB
Audio interface manufacturer and model: Apogee Duet the iOS+OS X version and Focusrite 18:8
 
User avatar
fuzzfilth
Posts: 4074
Joined: Mon Aug 03, 2009 2:31 am
Location: Germany

Re: Thoughts on this 80s kind of song?

Sun Feb 16, 2020 12:46 pm

Well, long intros had their time and place which is when radio jockeys used to talk over them, using the song as a backdrop until something interesting happens and/or the vocals set in. These times have long gone now and you need a hook in the first three seconds or so. And the times being what they are, you need some ear candy every couple of seconds to keep attention up. And this is where the question comes up again "Interesting enough for what?" So who is your target demographic ?
- Current pop music listeners ? Wrong song and production (but you knew that)
- Late Boomers/ early Gen X who feed their 80s nostalgia ? Worth a shot, but they might prefer listening to Sweet Dreams (which starts with an epic hook right away) and People are People (ditto)

Also, listening situation is relevant.
- Dead center in an actual mixtape while on the way across the continent ? Pretty good chances of getting heard for even a long intro.
- Playlist on the phone between classes ? Not so much.
Christian Obermaier
Contact me for private Logic Consulting, Training, Troubleshooting via Skype, Zoom or Teamviewer

1 x MacPro 6core 2010 24Gb RAM
2 x MacBookPro i7 2012 16Gb RAM
OSX.14.6. Mojave, Logic X.4.4 & 5.1
 
MikeRobinson
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Joined: Thu Nov 05, 2015 3:42 pm
Location: Just south of Chattanooga, Tennessee, USA.

Re: Thoughts on this 80s kind of song?

Thu Feb 20, 2020 7:36 pm

My candid thoughts about this track – relative to "the 80's style" trope – is that right now it is both "much too unhurried," and, musically speaking, "much too thin."

"Unhurried" refers to the observation that I'm not being pummeled with musical ideas within the first thirty seconds of the song. "Thin" refers to the fact that most of the available frequency ranges aren't being used. Where's the bass? Where's most of the midrange?
Mike Robinson
"I wanna quit being a computer consultant and become a composer and arranger at age fifty-nevermind."
Logic Pro X, MacBook Pro, 88-key MIDI controller.
Just south of Chattanooga, Tennessee, USA